"The only thing we have to fear is fear it'self - nameless, unreasoning, unjustified, terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance."
---- FDR - First Inaugural Address, March 4, 1933
This picture epitomized what I had been thinking for some time. Apparently, it was posted originally on Salon.com, but very small. It was blown up and recreated by a guy named Al Haug on Facebooks and I 'borrowed' it because it so nicely summed up my thoughts. Thanks, Al and whoever created it. I am blowing it up and printing it out and framing it for my front door.
Just recently, there was a push to repeal the Don't Ask, Don't Tell mandate for the military, initiated during the Clinton Administration. It failed. The Republicans blame the Democrats and the Dems blame the Repubs. Even the military weighed in saying they would prefer to have the lie than the truth.
I worry about a nation that is willing, and even eager, to base a system on lies. To believe it is okay to continue to institutionalize lying by omission is still lying, something that our parents were very clear about when we tried it as children, but something that seems to meet with cultural approval when adulthood is reached.
This is the same approval that allows and encourages the lies of adoption. It is a sad thing that to grease the way for a continuation of the peddling in fresh infant flesh, lies
We have a generation of children who think that cheating is okay as long as they are not caught, even in gaming, who think that corporations are not bound by the same rules of right and wrong as the rest of us, and there is nothing immoral in what they do, since it is "just business." This is the same generation whose education has shrunken to what will gain their school districts the highest rating in standardized testing scores, and have almost no exposure to the classics, music, art, literature. They never learn to do critical thinking, have no love of the beauty of family, heritage, kin, and bloodlines, and yet are drawn to kin like moths to flames.
I fear for this generation. They have been raised on mixed messages and lies, so how can we ever expect them to see that lying shrivels the soul. I think that the legislators need to relearn the lessons that they learned in kindergarten....Lying is Wrong. Mother said so.
14 comments:
All part of not having the boundaries that make kids feel secure and help them learn principles and values.
We have good company in that pit into which we are sliding...let's see...there is the Ancient Roman Empire, The Mayan Civilization, Macedonia, Ancient Greece and the former Soviet Union...all perished for their arrogance and slef-justifications. Watch out, here comes the US!!
What bothers me is that, even as we seniors were being taught much more than the kids are taught in the present day, we were also being taught lies about our heritage and our nation.
A civilization's disintergration is brought about by the erosion of lies.
Oh...and great blog, Sandy. I agree, totally.
You fear for the rising generation and yet you tell them that they should do whatever they want and take no responsibility for their actions. Had sex and got pregnant? Well shoot, the government will take care of you and your baby! Don't worry about a thing and don't ever consider adoption! You can live below poverty and basically guarantee that your children will live below poverty for all of their lives. It won't be stable, you won't always have food or clothing, but you'll have each other -- and the taxpayers will support you!
What crap. No one is telling anyone any such thing. Boy, not only are you a coward, Anon, but you twist the message better than a fundie preacher. You must be feeling really desperate to make comments on two blogs that you don't even back with your own name.
No one is telling people that? Head on over to any public forum about adoption, look for posts where people are considering adoption.
See, here is the difference, Anon. This is NOT a public forum, and we are NOT telling women that.
There is a big, huge difference between offering temporary assistance and a lifetime on the dole, which is no longer likely in the United States with the changes that have been made in Public Assistance. Since the vast majority of relinquishing mothers are middle class college students, tyhey are unlikely to spend more than a few minutes in poeverty, let alone a generation. You make such sweeping assumptions that it is difficult to identify where to begin at addressing them!
Lastly, what is so noble about adopting and using taxpayer money to finance or to do so? Why is THAT welfare so much grander than welfare that helps keep a natural family together?
Your arguments are ill-informed and illogical. Do your homework, check on Adoption Welfare, Adoption Subsidies and the guidelines for TANF! Then we will talk, maybe.
You're not telling women to NOT consider adoption? To look at all the "assistance" available to them? Most relinquishing mothers are in college? Then why are you and your other anti-adoption friends saying that most relinquishing mothers are teenagers who are being pressured and coerced into adoption? When I was in college I was independent and able to make decisions on my own.
Look, I'm not saying adoption is perfect and everyone should do it. I believe a child should stay with its parents if it's possible for them to provide a stable, loving home. There are definitely things in the adoption world that need to change. But one of those things is anti-adoption voices saying all adoptions are BAD and coerced. It's not right, just like it's not right for me to generalize your experiences.
There are changes that need to be made. Why can't we meet in the middle? It's not black and white.
Anonymous,
Can you please tell me how the hell anyone would know how to come together, as you say, when you are too cowardly to even use a handle when you post on my blog? How would you suggest we come together with Anonymous? Would we meet you in a dark alley? A coffee shop? Would you wear a carnation in your lapel? Would you give us a physical description so that we could pick you out of the CROWD of anonymous posters that hit and run on people who put their names out's blogs? How would we know you?
Further, what exactly do you have in mind in your great 'coming together'? We reform adoption so that it is cheaper and easier for you? That mothers of the past, like me and a few others sit down and shut up and let the industry and adopters like you speak on our behalf? Should we again deny our rigths and subjugate ourselves to YOU and others whose rights are so much more important than ours? '
Since I am a EMS mother and have stated not once but a MILLION times that I am ONLY interested in working on issues that affect EMS mothers, obviously that is what you are interested in working on,in your suggestion, so what do you intend to do for ME? What do you intend to do for the millions of mothers like me? What are you doing to open the access to the original birth certificates for adoptees and for the women who gave them life? What are you doing to help young women to insure they have adequate access tyo birth control, options, and information to make an INFORMED and educated choice?
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When you can answer those questions and tell ME what YOU are doing rather than ONLY offer criticism for what I am doing then maybe we will have something to talk about. Let me paraphrase an old axiom...."Those who can do..those who can't make anonymous criticism on other people's blogs."
Apparantly there's only one side to this issue and no room for discussion. Good to know. I'll leave you to your negativity.
good anser, anon
""Apparantly there's only one side to this issue and no room for discussion. Good to know. I'll leave you to your negativity.""
Yeah, real "good anser"..anon.
Is this Anon person *ansering* itself??? And no room for discussion, when Sandy asked questions, to open the door to discussion?? Evidently this Anon person only wants to hear it's own self speak and does not know the meaning of "discussion".
Good God...where do these people come from? They can criticize and criticize some more, but when asked pointed questions, they cut and run. People like this are just plain cowards, is all I can say. And how is your asking pointed questions of an Anon person.. Sandy...a "negativity"?? Sheesh!
Are the ugly, petty trolls gone yet? I feel like the kid in "The Sixth Sense." Only "I see cowards." *gasp
Kitta here:
I belong to some local legislative action groups that work in child welfare. We sometimes work in the adoption/relinquishment/foster care area.
For many years, I also worked with 2 national organizations that helped mothers/fathers and adopted people who were searching for each other. Legislative issues were sometimes part of the mission, as well, and adoptive parents were included if they wished to be.
Adoptive parents' main interest, when asked, seems primarily to be: how to find a child and how to terminate the natural parents' rights as quickly as possible.
Then, there is the AP concern with making sure the termination cannot be undone, especially by the father.
APs have concerns with keeping costs down, and with finding children who are healthy, and with "not being scammed"..themselves..but I have not heard any concern with whether adoption of the child is necessary in the first place.
And that is the number one concern that I have, ethically. I think that most children who are/have been/will be adopted could and should remain with their natural parents or families of origin.
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